Fox on Fox Crime

Foxy LadyI’m always asked whether I like FOX or not. I don’t want to answer, because if I do, my political leanings will be known instantly. Next thing you know, I’ll have some rabbit chatting me up in the backyard about where I stand on global warming.

Hey, I’d rather be cleansing my system of my morning’s chow rather than debating the merits of global warming claims. For the record, I’m all for it. Cold air makes my joints stiff. Whaddya expect? I’m 108 and won’t live long enough to have to deal with the consequences of cows farting 24/7.

So I won’t tell you if I like Fox, but I can tell you there’s a fox that doesn’t like fox. Don’t understand? Then read this story.

Tommy Fox was driving home from his job in Dover Wednesday at about 11 p.m. when a beautiful red fox dashed in front of his SUV.

After he ran over the fox, he stopped his GMC Jimmy to get the fox to cut off its tail for a souvenir, and he put it in the back seat, said Dale Grandstaff, a Tennessee Wildlife Resources Agency wildlife officer.

“The tails are real bushy and pretty and thick this time of year,” Grandstaff said.

Who wouldn’t want the tail from some recent road kill? Let’s face it, that tail would look mighty cool hanging next to the skunk tail in the formal dining room.

Things took an odd turn when Fox heard a noise coming from his back seat and realized the fox was alive – and not happy.

The driver desperately searched for something to hold the fox back and prevent him from climbing into the front seat and biting him, he told Grandstaff.

As he looked in the back seat to get a blanket to block the fox, he took his attention from the road.

The SUV crossed the center line and wrecked in a ditch, flipping once and landing upside down in the 3900 block of Lylewood Road, Grandstaff said.

Fox suffered minor injuries and bruises and was treated at the scene by Montgomery County Emergency Medical Service.

Fox was this close to being nominated for a Darwin Award. Alas, he’s still with us, but our other fox was not so lucky.

The fox was found dead in the SUV. Grandstaff said it was not clear whether the animal died of injuries caused by being hit by the SUV or if it died in the wreck. It was also not known if Tommy Fox got to keep the tail.

If I saw this in a movie, I wouldn’t believe it. It just goes to show, life can be stranger than fiction. Therefore I’m re-evaluating the plausibility of this scene from Tommy Boy.



I felt like I was watching a Ken Burns documentary while watching that!


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