Elvis Spotted Attacking Pensioner

As an experienced canine I’ve learned one thing: do not bite the hand that feeds you. If you do, you can kiss your milkbones, cheweys and the fatty parts of steaks goodbye.

I didn’t come to this conclusion because of my book learnin’ but because of my street smarts.

You’d think that an animal living in the streets would be just as wise and follow in my pawsteps. Not so. You see, Elvis the squirrel bit the one hand that was there to help him.

Elvis, the injured squirrel, has left a caring pensioner in need of hospital treatment.

Ernie Gordon, 75, came to the six-month-old rodent’s rescue but it was not impressed.

The squirrel, named Elvis the Pelvis, sank his teeth into Mr Gordon’s finger and thumb – leaving him in need of a tetanus injection and a course of antibiotics.

Mr Gordon, a squirrel-fanatic, had been called out to rescue the squirrel after workmen spotted the injured animal in a timber yard in Alnwick, Northumberland.

The pensioner took him to the vets where an X-ray revealed he had a broken pelvis.

But when he took him home to care for him the squirrel turned on his rescuer.

Elvis bit his right-hand index finger, then his left hand thumb.

We all make choices. The real Elvis chose to chew on peanut butter and banana sandwiches, Elvis the squirrel decided human hands were tastier still, and Mr Gordon will, no doubt, decide that squirrel kabobs are the best of them all.


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