Cat Grows Angel Wings – Still Annoying

Some cats will do anything to get humans to like them, but let’s face it they’ve got nothing on us dogs.

Do they bring the paper to their owners? Get their slippers? How about protecting them from strangers? I didn’t think so.

Granted, I don’t do any of those things either, but at least I’m a wiling outlet for their excessive overtures of love. Trust me, it isn’t always easy being fawned over, but I do my best. Most felines will just walk away to take a nap in the silverware drawer instead. That is, if they don’t have a date with the kitty litter box already.

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Pigs are Fat and Loud

So my mother walks into the local Petco store with me safely secured on a leash next to her, and one of the employees has the audacity to ask, “Is that a pig you got with you?”

The nerve of that guy. I was so mad I could hardly reply back, “No, that’s my mother!”

OK…it’s an old joke, but always smells fresh to me.

Anyway,  it’s a great lead in to today’s story about pigs and the damage they can do to our owners.

You’d think a story about the porcines among us would be about how they jam up arteries with fatty plaque, but that’s where you’d be wrong. The Farmer’s Weekly Interactive has all the details (yes, THE Farmer’s Weekly Interactive!!). Read more

Mean Bees Suck

It’s that time of year when Mother Nature unleashes her latest graduates from kindergarten flight school. FYI…the ones in high school graduate later this month.

That means we need to get out the insect spray to make our lives a bit more bearable. Let’s face it, it’s no fun hovering over a kitty snickers bar in the yard when you have to fight the flies off for control.

Worse yet is when I pick flowers in the fields for my mother and the bees chase me off. Yes I pick flowers for my mother.  By pick I mean dig up, and by fields I mean her garden.

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Bank Bailout for Ducks

I like ducks.

Yeah, ducks. You know, like Daffy and Donald and Howard and ahhh, what’s her name? The ugly one. Uhhm, I can’t remember her name, but my point is there’s lots of them and they all seem to make the world a better place.

That got me to wondering why some restaurants like to serve them, even though the reviews aren’t that great for the actual meal. I base my observations on the messages I keep sniffing at the local fire hydrant that say ducks are greasy and difficult to eat. I’m thinking it’s a lot like my mother’s boiled chicken. If she’s reading this, please note that the boiling water does nothing to enhance the flavor of the pimply, rubbery skin you serve me. Read more

Help Refused to Dog Who Dialed Emergency Line

I remember being a young pup and the accompanying lack of self confidence I felt when approaching cute, chick pups to chat them up.

My head was too big for my body, my paws were like mitts on a baby and my bark had yet to change to the deep masculine one I now sport. In addition to that I couldn’t trust what came out of my mouth, if anything at all.

If that doesn’t make you feel like a l-o-s-e-r, nothing will.

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Cougar Survives Tazer Attack from Police

Cats are big, cats are small but even a pocketbook dog would beat them all.

That’s what I believe, anyway.

No doubt, humans believe they would beat them, too. A feeling I would agree with, if only for the advanced technology humans always have within paws reach.

But then a story comes across my computer screen that makes me say, “Oh my DOG, I’m glad I have no human blood coursing through my veins.”

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Dog Stops Traffic To Save Mother

Sometimes I see a heartwarming story and I just find the need to share it with the world.

A lot of you probably think that all New York City dogs are obnoxious, self absorbed and bark funny. To that all I can say is stop getting all your news from Cat Fancy magazine. NYC pups are no different than the ones in Kansas, Alabama or Hawaii. Well the ones in Hawaii are a bit happier.

Look no further than Husky, the son of a yellow lab-mix named Chile, and his heroic efforts to save his mother this morning. Read more

Seahorse Gets 2 to 1 Odds on Survival

I hate it when folks can’t make up their minds. How hard is it to just make a decision and move on with life?

Why take more than a split second to decide whether to eat the chips or the potato salad first on the dish sitting in front of you? Why spend any time wondering whether to smell a new visitor’s crotch before licking their hand? And time spent thinking about the repercussions of sitting in the old man’s chair is just wasteful.

I say do what makes you feel good.

Today’s story has nothing to do with making decisions, but is used to show that God doesn’t always decide correctly either. How else to explain the seahorse? Read more

Dog Saves Thousands of Air Travelers From Death

If I were to fly the friendly skies of this united world, I know what they’d call me.

Sully.

You know, as in Captain Chelsey  Sullenberger , the hero pilot that landed a jet into the Hudson River a few months ago. If you’re going to do something, do it right I say. If not, you might as well just roll over in bed, if only to keep from aggravating your bed sores.

Looks like a border collie in Oregon is one step ahead of the pack when it comes to flying. She’s got a job with the local airport. Here’s the story on why. Read more

Every Which Way But Loose

Humans think they’re so superior. They believe no animal is capable of outsmarting them.

Really? Then how do you explain my ability to escape from the backyard whenever I want? Does a mere wooden fence deter me? Does adding pavers at its base get me to stay within its boundaries? How about the addition of chicken wire?

The answers are no, no and no.

And why is that? Because I’m freakin’ brilliant. Imagine what I could do with opposable thumbs! Read more

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