Stress Test
January 7 | 1 Comment
I never put much stock in book learnin’.
Maybe it’s because I never went to college. Truth be told I never went to high school either, or even obedience training. I’m a dog from the streets, using common sense to get me where I am today.
Undoubtedly I’ve missed out on some great experiences: Guzzling water straight from a funnel while my brothers in arms chant “Chug, Chug, Chug!”, adding the freshman 15 with late night pizza treat delivery binges and going cow tipping instead of studying for the midterm sit/stay exam. Ahh, if only we were able to go back in time and choose differently.
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Skunk’s BMI Off The Chart After Bacon Binge
January 6 | 3 Comments
I’m a hearty eater.
If I had input into my daily rations it would look something like this:
Breakfast: bacon and eggs- hold the eggs and give me extra bacon- preferably crispy
Lunch: bacon, lettuce and tomato sandwich- hold the lettuce and tomato. Oh, and substitute the bread for some bacon.
Dinner: A pig. Yeah the whole damn thing. It’s dinner time for crying out loud. You want me to starve?
As the Penguin World Turns
January 4 | 2 Comments
Love. You can’t beat it.
I love stretching out on the bed in the morning and getting a vigorous belly rub. I love barking by the kitchen window when I see my parents come home. I love cuddling with my old man on a Saturday afternoon in the spare bedroom.
What can I say, I’m just a love machine. I just hope my batteries don’t run out too soon.
But for humans, sometimes love doesn’t last. Just ask Jon and Kate, famous for making the other eight. Their true love turned into jealousy and selfishness. Oh well, it doesn’t always have to be that way.
