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Birds Booze It Up?

Funny Dog Book Bad To The Bone The old man calls it the Fleischmann Flu.

I know what the real cause of his illness is; being a booze-hound. You can’t fool me.

It all starts innocently enough with a call from a friend to go out for ‘just one’ beer. Hours later a call comes in. I hear my mother say, “OK, but be careful!”

He knows, and I know, he’s just received the green light to have a few more beers. Hours later a cab stops in front of the house, its doors open and my father pours out. He comes in the house, heads straight into the kitchen and starts eating everything in site.

Treats flow easily to me. This is my time, and I make the most of it because I know the next day will be a dud. He’ll be horizontal without an ounce of energy, afflicted with the ‘flu’.

When I read the following article, I couldn’t help but wonder whether some-bird was pulling the wool over someone’s eyes.

A mystery illness resembling human drunkenness has caused hundreds of native birds to fall out of the sky in the tropical Australian city of Darwin. The brightly-coloured lorikeets are receiving treatment at an animal hospital with symptoms similar to alcohol abuse in people.

It is unclear what is causing Darwin’s inquisitive and gregarious lorikeets to unceremoniously fall to Earth. Vets say it could take some birds several months to recover.

The mystery ailment often strikes these small parrots at the end of the wet season in Australia’s rugged Northern Territory. About 200 birds are being looked after by vets suffering what appears to be a giant hangover.

The splendidly-coloured birds with blue faces, red beaks and green wings are a sorry sight. Bleary-eyed and dishevelled, the cantankerous patients are suffering from headaches and a lack of energy. Many seem to want just a good lie down.

Tests have failed to reveal the cause of their distress and their rehabilitation could take a few months.

When the groggy lorikeets do finally emerge from this debilitating fog, they will be released back into the wild, where they roam in large, noisy flocks.

If they’re looking for a case, they may want to check the local bird-bar. Just sayin’

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