Mental Issues Plague Stuffed Toys
September 8 | 6 Comments
Yeah, stuffed animals.
Take, for instance, a ridiculous stuffed bear my brother Goliath plays with every morning. The poor bear is drenched in drool, thrown about the house, and makes a mooing sound.
Mooing as in a cow. What’s wrong with this bear, is he species confused or did he come from the land of misfit toys?
All I know is I’m looking for sleep and all I hear is this bear, er cow. When I doze back into a slumber, I dream of chasing old Elsie in the green pastures of my youth, ready to devour its flank, or ribs, or even tongue.
I get all excited, and for what? A dry bowl of kibble, that’s what. What a let down…each and every morning.
But, back to the bear. Why does it sound like a bovine? Did the Designer of all things misplace his bear-growl sound maker and go with the cheap cow alternative? Or did the Speak and Say toy I had as a pup, teach me the wrong sounds of farmyard animals everywhere?
Who knows, but all I do know is Goliath’s bear isn’t the only stuffed animal with issues. Check these poor German toys out.
The toys range from Dub, a turtle who suffers depression, to Kroko, a crocodile with an acute phobia of water, as well as an hallucinating snake called Sly and a sheep called Dolly who has a personality disorder.
The toys are made by 36-year-old Martin Kittsteiner, of Hamburg, who says: ‘It started as a bit of a joke with my girlfriend, who has lots of soft toys, and then we thought there could be something in the idea.’
He added: ‘Children and grown ups like their vulnerability and find something in them that gives them a great sense of comfort in helping to heal them.’
‘I think some adults see it as a form of therapy for themselves.’
The cuddly toys are sold from the parapluesch.de website – styling itself the Psychiatric Institute for Abused Cuddly Toys – where customers can also play an online game as a doctor trying to diagnose the toys’ problems.