September 21 | Hmmm...No Comments Yet
Have you ever wondered what it would be like to have super powers? You know, the ability to do something really special.
A dog’s well documented skill set includes super smelling senses, super gulping power and super poo that heals the young. But what if that’s not enough for us, if we want to be better than that?
I know what I’d want. I would add to my repertoire x-ray vision, if only to see under the flirtatious Shaggy Dog’s coat that prances around my neighborhood. I know that sounds wrong, and it probably is, but I tell it like it is.
September 15 | 4 Comments
Damn it’s been hot down here in Georgia lately. I hear the whole east coast hasn’t fared much better.
Thank goodness for air conditioning. Whatever you do, don’t listen to those nutbags that want us to stop using it.
There are times when we do need to leave the comfy confines of our homes, and as dogs we can only hope our owners are careful to monitor our heat index when out and about in the family car.
I probably shouldn’t bark this, but if it’s too hot our owners may want to reconsider taking us. Unless they take us into the pet supermarket, the butcher’s shop or the liquor store, is there a point in even going?
September 7 | Hmmm...No Comments Yet
I love that joke. It’s only second in my repertoire to; How do you stop an elephant from charging?
Take away his credit card.
Alright, I admit it. I love corny jokes. You want some more?
Why does the Pillsbury Doughboy wear an apron? Read more
July 11 | Hmmm...No Comments Yet
That’s a comment that will never pass the jowls of anyone describing me. I’m a working class mutt that likes to get his paws dirty at the dog park, and then down a 12-pack of Bowser Beer on the ride home. Granted, the chick-truck I travel in doesn’t have a gun rack but at least it isn’t pink.
May 24 | 2 Comments
I just found this news article about my latest efforts to save the world from itself.
Bo Hoefinger, the dog best known as the author of Bad To The Bone: Memoir of a Rebel Doggie Blogger, has offered his services to clean up the oil spill in the Gulf of Mexico.
As has been clearly documented, dog hair soaks up the oily remnants of drilling platforms gone bad better than sponges, handy wipes, and even wildlife. Quite simply, dog hair is to oil as paper towels are to pee in a living room.
With everyone getting angry at the lack of success in containing the oil spill, Hoefinger decided to do something about it.
April 1 | Hmmm...No Comments Yet
Take for instance the wheel, sliced bread or the internet. They made their inventors gazillions upon gazillions of dollars.
What? You say, they didn’t make their inventors anything?
Hmmm…well, then how about the pet rock? Now that was a great idea.
Making money is even easier if you have four legs and are artistically inclined. Heck you can just paint your way out of the dog house and into a dog mansion. That’s what a dog named Ziggy is doing.
March 17 | 2 Comments
It’s a skill that allows some to be better than others.
We’ve all experienced moments of intense concentration, where both time and space cease to exist. For me this mostly happens when there’s a beef stroganoff frozen dinner being cooked.
For others, this zen-like state is brought on by the thrill of a hunt. Read more
February 17 | Hmmm...No Comments Yet
I’m not saying I should be confused with some of the whack jobs in the industry, because I gotta be honest, I’m not going to whack off my ear to show the world how ‘brilliant’ I am. In my case, I’m just going to let my art speak for itself.
That art, as all of you should know by know, is the art of writing. Specifically the writing of the literary classic, and autobiography, “Bad to the Bone, Memoir of a Rebel Doggie Blogger“.
Or how about this:
The quick brown fox jumps over the lazy dog.
Ok, I plagiarized that last line from my typing teacher, but everything in my autobiography is original…and true!!
January 25 | 3 Comments
Don’t get me wrong I’m pro Harley, and motorcycles in general, but if I have an opportunity to recycle a joke then, by golly, I’m going to do it.
My mother on the other hand is not a fan of motorized cycles of the two wheel variety. I know she’s forbidden my father to get one. It’s not because of safety concerns, but rather the fear he’d ride around town side saddle.
I’m with her. Can you imagine if he wanted to take me along for a ride? Not only would the dogs in town be woofing in laughter at me, but a chorus of cat meow snickering would surely follow! Read more
October 29 | 1 Comment
We’ve been known to jump through hoops for acceptance, but there are some of us who’ll go just a bit further. Take this Mastiff for instance.